Hi, my name is Lori and I’m a romance writer who does not like Valentine’s Day


Is there a  recovery group for that? How could I not be in love with what is supposed to be the most romantic day of the year?

I think romance is directly related to either the time or the thought put into the effort. I am sure there are plenty of people that put lots of time and effort into planning a special day. But here is my take on the commercialized version of the holiday.

  • Stopping at the gas station or grocery store to pick up flowers, balloons and chocolate say to me, “Honey, I did not think of you until the last minute.” And, “I did not really think about what would make you happy. I did what society expects me to do.”
  • The giant teddy bear on tv or the chocolate scented one at the grocery store (yes they really do exist) are just plain creepy. Men, do you really want your woman snuggling with a stuffed animal instead of you?
  • Okay, I know most women love flowers. Maybe I’m crazy, but does anyone else have this problem? I can’t see the people on the other side of the table I want to talk to? I’m constantly moving them from location to location to get them out of my way!
  • Chocolate. Yes I do love chocolate, but I also love fitting into my clothes.
  • Wine. Maybe that’s the answer. No complaints there. But if you drink enough, you could probably forget about the lack of emotion behind your “pick up on the way home from work” gift.

One romantic thing my husband did recently was tell me he was going to take the day off from work just to spend it with me. It was not forced upon him by a manufactured holiday. It was genuine and completely unexpected. I look at that as my Valentine’s Day, because who out there with kids gets to spend the day alone with their significant other anyway? And if you are able to make it out, it’s to an overcrowded restaurant with overpriced specials.

And ladies, what do you do for your men? I don’t think the holiday is marketed as much toward pleasing them. I usually make mine his favorite meal (which takes three hours to prepare).

I would love to hear other’s opinions. Please give me your thoughts on Valentine’s Day. I know it must have some redeeming qualities. Please tell me why you love it. 🙂


10 thoughts on “Hi, my name is Lori and I’m a romance writer who does not like Valentine’s Day”

  1. I personally do not like being told when I have to show love to my wife. The $95 roses that were $25 yesterday just doesn’t work for me. Luckily, my wife actually feel the same way. When I buy my wife flowers it’s when I want to buy her flowers, when I feel she needs flowers and mostly when I just want her to feel good. I don’t need a date on a calendar to tell me when I’m supposed to do this.
    PS. She likes wine too

  2. I enjoy Valentine’s Day probably thanks to my childhood. My dad would get mom the flowers she loved (which he also gave her most of the year when he eventually had the money to) and a gift of jewelry she wanted (not a heart-shaped item bought last minute). And we were included… mom would get us a small toy and a small heart-shaped box of chocolate. As I grew older, even when I was single, I’d go out with friends as a way to celebrate our friendships. And it was a welcome break from the dead of Winter that follows the holidays. (Otherwise, all you get in February is President’s day discounts on mattresses/appliances… or maybe a day to get irrationally angry at a groundhog). Now my family makes Valentine’s Day a day to have fun together. I make hubby a romantic meal and avoid the madness at the restaurants. And we make it fun for our son with heart-shaped pizzas and Valentine desserts. I want my son to enjoy it and not be angry or hate it when he eventually has a girlfriend who may not take kindly to a man who won’t do something for her on Valentine’s Day.

  3. Michele, I am so glad you have such beautiful memories. That does always tend to make a holiday more special. I am glad you are continuing it on with your son. I do agree with you that a holiday in the middle of this dreary weather is welcome. I may not appreciate receiving the gifts at the grocery store, but it is a beautiful site to see the balloon arches, flowers, reds and pinks as you go to check out.

  4. Hi. We never go out on Valentine’s Day, but wait until the madness subsides. Tomorrow evening, we are going to Cafe Renaissance in Vienna, where Brian proposed 12 years ago:) Gillian still enjoys making us cards, which is truly special. This year, she bought a Valentine’s Day gift for our 7 month old puppy – a new, supposedly indestructible ball:)

  5. Carolyn, I think going out on another day is a great idea. Even better that you have such a special place to go. Enjoy. I am glad Gillian enjoys Valentine’s. I think it can be lots of fun for kids. 🙂

  6. Valentine’s Day was invented for the purpose of making me feel inadequate.

    It’s what happens every day, all day, through thick and thin, that matters. That part’s working just fine, thank goodness.

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